Galatians 5:14 GNT: For the whole Law is summed up in one commandment: “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” (Tweet this)

By Jenny Downey

 

A cracked toilet tank recently became the catalyst for an intense month of DIY home projects. The leaky culprit forced our hands. We had no choice but to replace the broken toilet. However, one thing led to another, and before long we were tackling new flooring, paint, trim, vanity, lights and plumbing. With Christmas bills coming in, it seemed wise to keep the project low-budget by doing the work ourselves. Healthy doses of YouTube videos, Googled articles and Pinterest links helped supplement our lack of experience.

The bathroom was such a success, we decided to take on the kitchen.  And oh, my, how that project has gotten out of hand!  People keep telling me that my social media posts about our DIY projects are inspiring them. That’s a lot of pressure! A recent bout of insomnia found me wide awake at 2am debating floor stain options. I realized I was getting way too worked up about all this, which then led me to reflect on some of the lessons I’ve been learning through all of this DIY detritus, most of which have spiritual correlations, of course:  

 

#1 Chaos Proceeds Progress

What is the first step in most remodeling projects?  Demolition.  Rip out the broken, remove the outdated, strip off the unwanted, and get rid of the debris before ushering in the new.  All these things make a mess.  Chaos and messes make me uptight because I have a high need for order.  However, in this DIY process, I have learned to accept the chaos because it is necessary and doesn’t last forever if I will work through it.  The bathroom is a beautiful, finished accomplishment.  I think God allows me to experience chaos in other areas of my life because HE is working towards a beautiful, finished project through my sanctification.  He must introduce chaos to rid stuff in my life, too, like the debris of unforgiveness, the outdated habits that lead to sin, and the broken parts that keep me from experiencing growth in Him.

God allows me to experience chaos in other areas of my life because HE is working towards a beautiful, finished project through my sanctification (click to tweet)

#2 Everything Takes Longer Than You Think

Unexpected setbacks, interruptions, & responsibilities paired with multiple trips to the hardware store make for an adjusted project timeline.  Sadly, my kids keep expecting dinner and the laundry continues piling up, forcing me to halt DIY activity and work on domestic duties.  Spiritual growth seems to follow a similar pattern; it’s not a streamlined path of forward progress.  I have seasons of intense growth and seasons of stagnancy where I question if I am maturing at all. BUT…God is at work and my rushing the process would not equal the best outcome. There are friends who need a listening ear, kids who need love, attention and prayer, neighbors who need a helping hand. These are worthy of my time, even if they mean slowing down the DIY work and putting my project task-list on hold temporarily.  

 

#3 Dependence on Others is Not a Weakness

This entire season of DIY has revealed how much we depend on others, thereby rendering the term “Do It Yourself” a huge misnomer.  We’ve asked for advice, borrowed tools, invited feedback, and welcomed help. We’re on a first-name basis with a helpful Home Depot employee who seems invested in our success. My husband, Neil, & I have tackled things we never knew we could do because we had each other for support in the process. One of us has to give the other a pep talk to press on and finish when the going gets tough. We problem solve, brainstorm, and laugh at our mistakes. Somehow, doing it together makes it bearable. To me, this is a picture of life connected to God and church community.  We share the WHOLE of life, accepting that others might have the answers we seek or the wisdom to help us through a problem if we humble ourselves to ask.

 

#4 Mistakes Don’t Have to De-Rail Us

We’ve definitely had our share of DIY “oops” moments. Some have been easy fixes, while others have required an adjustment to the plans. One example is the paint color…it didn’t match the paint chip at all!  Thankfully it still looks awesome, and we are glad it turned out the color it did.  God delights in taking our “oops” moments and crafting them into something better than we imagined.  It takes trust from us, though. God knows what He is doing, even if we may doubt His process at times.

 

So, as of right now, the kitchen is still in progress.  Painting cabinets led to painting walls which led to sanding and restaining floors and now we find ourselves searching for new countertops.  None of this is coming easily. We are learning as we go, correcting mistakes, seeking advice, borrowing from others’ experiences, and persevering through setbacks.  Like faith, something transformative is happening amidst the drop-clothes, sawdust, and piles of tools.  

 

 

 

 

 

Jenny Downey…
loves sharing the humor in life.  Many days find her driving carpool, meeting clients for real estate appointments, or traveling to soccer tournaments.  She and Neil have common interests of music, reading, trying new recipes, DIY projects, cheering their four children on in soccer and choir, and watching Netflix.  The grace of God has been a consistent theme in her life.  That, and coffee.

To connect with Jenny on social media, click the links below:

Proverbs 10:14
The wise store up knowledge…

“What’s wrong with your eye?” was a question I was asked quite a bit back when I was teaching. Kids ask questions adults would never DREAM of voicing, don’t they? Born with a lazy eye that two surgeries hadn’t completely corrected by that time, I was used to the questions and didn’t mind explaining. And once I’d explained what was wrong, the kid asking usually didn’t think anything of it again.

I much preferred the asking that led to an understanding of what was going on because then they knew which of my eyes was the one that was REALLY looking at them.  I liked that vs what usually happened – and what still happens – with adults who would never, EVER ask me such a question: the two of us stuck in an awkward dance while we’re visiting because my left eye is off doing its own thing.  They keep moving to the left to be in that eye’s line of sight and I keep following their steps, turning after them so the right eye, the eye my brain is actually using, is able to see them. I’ve turned in a complete circle because of this process while visiting with someone after church and they didn’t say a thing.  It used to bother me, but now I find it quite comical.

Why do adults stop asking questions? It seems like the older we get, the less we step out and ask the awkward questions.  Until, of course, we’re really old and don’t care about being embarrassed anymore.  Lol  But from about 13-60ish, we limit ourselves from asking questions that would give us a deeper understanding of something or someone. 

This seems to be the case especially within the church.  We the church, as a general rule, choose the path of politeness over the one of inquisition. “Don’t ask this. Don’t say anything about that. Don’t ever bring THAT up. Don’t. Don’t. Don’t.” And for what reason?  Out of fear…of what someone will think of us?  Of offending someone?  Or fear of confrontation with someone?  I’ve always struggled with trying to appear to ‘have all the answers’ vs being willing to be the person who asks the awkward questions.  My husband is good at it though, sometimes asking away with little to no inhibition, and he’s learned a lot over the years as a result of taking this risk of ‘looking dumb.’  I’ll even admit to sometimes pretending to understand what people are talking about, nodding in agreement as they explain something, just so I don’t feel/look dumb.  Do you do this as well?  Do you only ask the ‘safe’ questions?  Or only ask ones that are expected or that don’t stir up any trouble?  Do you ever hold back from asking the questions you SHOULD be asking or WANT to ask?

Nicodemus wasn’t afraid. Ok, sure, he snuck away during the night to talk to Jesus so he could avoid his colleagues judging him or maybe making him wear a dunce cap for asking what they thought to be dumb questions.  But he still made a huge effort to go get some answers to his questions. He sought out Jesus and wasn’t afraid of looking dumb in front of Him; he wanted to better understand God’s plan and how Jesus fit into that.  He wanted to KNOW Scripture better.   Nicodemus was a member of the Jewish ruling council, so he would’ve known the Jewish laws (aka the Old Testament) quite well because he had to teach them and use them in his daily work. But his questions like “How can someone be born when they are old?” gave us the answers that include the most well-known verse of all time: John 3:16. If Nicodemus hadn’t asked those questions on that night, if he hadn’t been brave enough to go to Jesus and quench his thirst for understanding, John wouldn’t have been able to write about their interaction. And we wouldn’t be able to read about it today and have the understanding we do of why Jesus came to earth and had to do all that he did.

How can we be more like Nicodemus?  How can we continue being the inquisitive children we once were and keep asking questions that gain us a deeper understanding of the world and people around us? What if we were to keep asking the hard, embarrassing questions of our faith, our church, and our God?

       Maybe that’s what Jesus meant by having a “childlike faith.”  He meant for us to ask questions like children do, like Nicodemus did that night. – Tweet This!

Maybe He meant for us to keep chasing after knowledge and understanding.  To keep seeking and chasing after Him.  (“Seek and ye shall find…”  Matthew 7:7-8)  

 

What questions do you need to ask, with a childlike faith, to better understand something or to deepen your faith? Whether you think they’re dumb or embarrassing, ask them anyway. You may not gain complete understanding immediately, but I’m guessing the answers you receive will help you get there quicker than if you were to try to figure it all out yourself.  And who knows?  Maybe the answers you get will help many generations to come…

 

John 3 ESV

Now there was a man of the Pharisees named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews. ² This man came to Jesus^[a] by night and said to him, “Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher come from God, for no one can do these signs that you do unless God is with him.” ³ Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again^[b] he cannot see the kingdom of God.” ⁴ Nicodemus said to him, “How can a man be born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born?”⁵ Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. ⁶ That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.^[c] 7 Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You^[d] must be born again.’ ⁸ The wind^[e]blows where it wishes, and you hear its sound, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.”

⁹ Nicodemus said to him, “How can these things be?” ¹⁰ Jesus answered him, “Are you the teacher of Israel and yet you do not understand these things? ¹¹ Truly, truly, I say to you, we speak of what we know, and bear witness to what we have seen, but you^[f] do not receive our testimony.¹² If I have told you earthly things and you do not believe, how can you believe if I tell you heavenly things? ¹³ No one has ascended into heaven except he who descended from heaven, the Son of Man.^[g] 14 And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, ¹⁵ that whoever believes in him may have eternal life.^[h]

¹⁶ “For God so loved the world,^[i] that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. ¹⁷ For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. ¹⁸ Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God. ¹⁹ And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil. ²⁰ For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed. ²¹ But whoever does what is true comes to the light, so that it may be clearly seen that his works have been carried out in God.”

 

Shopping. Girls are supposed to love shopping, yes? I enjoy shopping for clothes for my kids. Or my husband. I’m pretty good at picking out things for other people most of the time (though, my teen daughter would argue otherwise). I love shopping for office supplies. Or decor. Or for storage solutions.

But, I. hate. shopping. for. clothes. for. myself.

Since having kids #3 and 4, I just haven’t enjoyed shopping for clothes for my body. I’ve avoided it at all costs and done only the bare minimum in order to appear like a “responsible citizen” when I have to go to places where there will be other people. I guess that’s my excuse for looking like a slob most of the time. I used to work outside the home and dress nicely. After being home for almost 16 years, I guess I’ve defaulted to choosing comfort over fashion most of the time. Granted, I have NEVER YET gone to a store in my pajama pants. I mean, come on, I do have SOME decency and self-respect left. Lol I like the clothes I wear most days because I feel comfortable in them. And with everything we have to deal with each day, isn’t comfort important? (I’m afraid I’m gonna be living in lounge pants by the time I’m an old lady *insert eye roll*).

Sure, comfort is important, but so are other things, you say. And since I’ve committed to stepping up my fashion game, here goes expanding my comfort-zone in SO. MANY. WAYS.

 

Item 1
Tahari Voilet Faux Leather Ballet Flat in Blush
These are cute and I usually love flats (as you can see in the other pics, I’m wearing my own black flats). But, these were a hair tight. Do they stretch over time? I also don’t like that you can see my toe butt cracks. Yes, toe crack is a thing. When it comes to shoes I usually avoid buying shoes that either A) make my feet look longer than they already are (this is why I don’t yet own a pair of Chuck Taylor’s) and B) show toe crack because who’s got time for that? I mean, how rude. Is that toe crack hangin’ outtta your shoe, like some kind of fashion plumber butt? Ew.  It doesn’t bother me on other people. Just on me. No toe crack from me out there polluting the vision of others.  Nope.

Decision: Nope.

 

Item 2
Kut from the Kloth Straight Leg jeans in Navy
These fit well. I like them and could see wearing them with things I already own. Although, I feel like I have a pile of jean on my ankles. Is it supposed to pile up like that? Asking for a friend. No, I’m asking for myself! Help! Lol

 

—-These are the jeans in every picture—

 

Decision: Not sure. Whatd’ya think?

 

 

Item 3
Daniel Rainn Bilson Pleat Detail Blouse in Burgundy
I kinda like this shirt! I love 3/4 sleeves because they make my arms look better…skinnier, shorter…I don’t know, just better. They also help with getting too hot. Which I tend to do if I’m doing ANYTHING. (I was a hot mess by the time I finished trying everything on!) The cami that’s attached is no good for me, as they usually aren’t. I like a little more coverage underneath shirts that are very see-thru. Believe me, I know full well that ain’t nobody wanna see that much Amy. 🙂

         

This is me [duh] showing off how the little cami is all in the back so I could get an idea what it looked like without it.  And, the 3rd pic is how I really feel about this whole process. Lol

Decision: Leaning toward yes.

 

 

Item 4
Honey Punch Rivington Textured Open Cardigan in Blush
I bet this would look really cute with those shoes that didn’t quite fit. What could I wear under this? I chose a basic black sleeveless top I already owned. But maybe that Daniel Rainn shirt would look good? It’s supposed to get to mid 80’s here today, so this was very hot. VERY hot. Granted, when it’s 20 degrees out this winter, I may better appreciate this sweater. But I’m thinking this color washes me out a bit. What say you?

     

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Decision: Leaning towards no.  Unless I shouldn’t?  I guess a bit wishy washy on this one…which means I probably shouldn’t buy it. :/

 

 

Item 5
Le Lis Alapay 3/4 Sleeve Printed Back Knit Top
Girl loves me a knit top!!! Hallelujah! I love this top. EXCEPT….the neck is so wide. Why, why, why? (this is why I hate shopping) If the neck were smaller like the Daniel Rainn shirt, I’d be buying this in a heartbeat. Really open necks bother me for many reasons I can’t explain; I just don’t feel comfortable in them. Never have, never will.

      

Decision: No. :,(

 

 

Ok, that’s it for this Fix! Leave your comments below – believe me, I need all the fashion advice I can get so don’t hold back. Also, can we get a hallelujah for all the fashion bloggers out there? Oh my, am I thankful God in heaven did not see fit to make me gifted in that area. Shopping in front of people, taking selfies (also very high up on my list of things I hate doing), and then writing about it all….yep, I need to go get some chocolate or take a nap now. Or both. Maybe this will be easier next time? At least I find joy in maybe bringing a laugh or two to your day at my expense. Laugh away, friend. Laugh away. I can’t hear you anyway. Lol

 

 

This is me getting the last laugh because I can wear this to work if I want to!  Ok, that was supposed to be funny…but maybe it’s a bit mean girl instead?  I meant it in love, friends!  In love…because I was in my regular work day clothes!   🙂  But seriously, do you ever think “if Mel Robbins can do it…and every male entrepreneur in the WORLD can wear t-shirts, why, oh why can’t I???”

 

If you want to give Stitch Fix a whirl yourself, use my referral link please and thank you! That’s the least you could do for laughing at me.
https://www.stitchfix.com/referral/14224010?sod=m&som=c

Hello friends!

Thanks to everyone who filled out my survey about what you’d be interested in studying/reading this fall!

And drum roll…..here are the TWO opportunities you can take advantage of!

 

Option 1 –

A lunchtime bible study that will discuss Everyday Peace by Katie Orr! (click on the photo to sign up)

 

Option 2 –

A night book group that will discuss Of Mess & Moxie by Jen Hatmaker!  (click on the photo to sign up)

 

I hope to see you in one of the groups.  These should be exciting books to dive into this fall!

 

Amy