By Jenny Downey
Are you one of those people who confidently claims, “I’ll know it when I see it?” Do you possess the magical ability to select entrees, outfits, vehicles, hairstyles, or furniture with decisive ease? Well I am not counted amongst that crew. This decision making skill somehow eludes me, and I have now encountered a new area where it comes into play: updating the house.
Choosing paint colors, floor covering, counter surface, backsplash and fixtures finds me stuck in the abyss of too many choices. I pour over photos in magazines and online, admiring the myriad options. But then freeze up when I actually have to make a decision – how can I know which one is just right for us? How do I land on just ONE when there are so many beautiful ideas? What if I have regrets and wish I had gone a different route? What if I discover something better after it’s too late? What if my friends don’t like my finished look?
And here lies the rub. People keep telling me, “It’s YOUR space, so do what you like and don’t worry about what other people think.” That is fine and dandy until you work in real estate and learn that there indeed comes a time when it matters. I’ve viewed way too many homes when a buyer is scratching their head, wondering “WHAT were they thinking…that is bizarre!” Don’t get me wrong…my husband has declared we can NEVER move again. My focus shouldn’t be concerned with resale, but still it remains entrenched as a filter.
As a result, my DIY kitchen update hovers in the land of unfinished potential whilst I labor over the mental exercise of making decisions. In the end, it will look a million times better than it did before, and ultimately that is where I have to set my mind. So if you visit my home, please appreciate the mental anguish that went into even the little things, such as outlet covers and toilet paper holders. While the physical labor was intense, the more grueling task was all the deciding.
Neil and I recently had a great discussion about choices. We looked at the huge box of college mail that piled up for Liam over the last two years and mused how students are now bombarded with so many options. Back in my senior year, it seemed most seniors were just trying to decide whether to head an hour north or south on I-29 for college.
Another area we considered was food. Neil made the point that we eat different foods every day, while most of the world eats the same few things day in, day out, if they are so lucky. I considered the lack of dietary variety in pioneer times and how spoiled we are now! I think about the grocery store, where there are probably 25 different types of BBQ sauce selections. Each aisle provides abundant practice in decision-making skills for me!
When did our western culture become obsessed with variety? When did we stop marveling at it and become numb and entitled? Have we succumbed to trivial distractions that occupy our minds when we could – or should – simplify and channel our thoughts for greater purposes? This is what I have noticed about myself: I am completely thrown off important pursuits when my mind is paralyzed by making decisions that ultimately don’t matter.
Now that this idea has been brought to my front burner, I must capture it and use this conviction so I can continue to grow and mature in my faith. I want to wrestle with my own tendencies and weaknesses and ask God to cause me to care less about subway tile and more about human souls. I must practice prioritizing decisions and investing more of my time into ones that count for eternity.
Around the world, millions of people are making daily decisions focused on one thing–survival. The concept of a backsplash is so foreign it would seem like the silliest thing ever to mentally grapple for days over which one to choose. Can I get beyond my own narrow reality and wake up to the plight of those around me who don’t have the luxury of a home, vehicle, job or nice dinners? How can I get involved and help make a difference in my own community?
This is what is rattling around in my cluttered brain today. Do you struggle with this as well? What are your thoughts?
Jenny Downey…
loves sharing the humor in life. Many days find her driving carpool, meeting clients for real estate appointments, or traveling to soccer tournaments. She and Neil have common interests of music, reading, trying new recipes, DIY projects, cheering their four children on in soccer and choir, and watching Netflix. The grace of God has been a consistent theme in her life. That, and coffee.
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